Sunday, September 23, 2012

Burning both ends of the midnight candle

I am learning something in my old age (and I am only thirty-one)...

I can no longer handle burning both ends of the midnight candle. I am not a teenager with limitless energy anymore. I am getting older and I need my sleep.

That being said I have another issue. I cannot sleep lately. This last weekend I had friends over and they suggested drinking. A part of me thought, "A night of drinking is usually followed by a night of serious sleep!" So I was on board and we had a blast!

Then, I went to bed. I didn't fall asleep until after 4:30 in the morning and I woke up no less than seven times in between 4:30 a.m. and 8:30 a.m. when I woke up and got out of bed!

To make matters worse, I am barely writing right now. I am so tired and exhausted that even writing this blog post is a chore! I mean really! Who is so tired that typing a blog post is hard?


I have finally had to accept that I won't get book two out by October 1st. That was my goal but at this point it has been with my editor for over two months. Even if she got it to me RIGHT NOW I wouldn't have the time to fix it, edit it, have her re-read it, and then finish it up. I could work 24-7 on it and still not have the time. I am a little upset by this and a lot sad but I also know this is just how things go sometimes. I WANT to do things in a certain time frame but things prevent that from happening. I have to accept that and move really isn't worth dwelling over after all...

On a different note, I realized this weekend that a huge reason for not meeting new friends and/or retaining them is my husband. I love the man to death but he isn't the most sociable person in the world. He is fine with it being just me and the kiddo's all of the time. But, I AM a sociable person and I LOVE having people around me! I don't know if he does it on purpose or if he is just that socially inept, but my husband is the master at making people feel uncomfortable around him.

Take last night for example. We were drinking with some of my friends and one of them mentioned going, let me pause here and say that I wouldn't have let her leave because she had been drinking...But my husband...he put the fear of God into her for asking it. I am actually a lot worried that she isn't going to feel comfortable coming around anymore because of that situation. He could have just said no and left it at that but he didn't. He took it too far and scared the beegeezers out of her...I know I wouldn't keep going to someones house if their spouse scared me or made me feel uncomfortable. So, now I am a little worried that I am going to lose a friend because my husband is an ass...The worst part is I would even understand.

Anyhow, on the writing front...not much is happening. I am hoping to have a ton more time to write when my cousin starts beauty school next week but I am not holding my breath until she actually starts and gets her butt to school! So much could go wrong between here and next week! BUT, if she does start on time, and things go according to plan, I will have 30 hours a week to devote to my writing! I am so excited!

Now I just have to sit back and see what twists and turns life is going to throw at me this week!


  1. Try that zzzzz quil (spelling) I have heard good things about it. She named the looked and we agreed that it should be called the Dougie :D

  2. Hahaha! Doug is hilarious. I've always loved his witty "I hate everyone" ora. Lmao!